Lake Toba Tour 1st March 2018 / 5th March 2018

Tour Ride Lake Toba 2018...

Lake Toba.

  Day 1:-  KLIA to Medan Airport.
   And away we go. Flight to Medan was scheduled at 0630hours. The most ungodliest flight time ever. 18 rider shrunk down to 15 at the final headcount. 3 rider cancelled their participation at the eleventh hour.
   This tour was master minded by Chairman KC. He suggested , we listened , somebody said ok. The rest nodded. And the plan was set to take off first day of March 2018. Not one person asked what to bring. How far we plan to ride. Where we were gonna spend the 3 nights. We were flying blind.

   That was how we ended up at KLIA midnight of March. Yong was the first to check in. I came by 10 minutes later. Dotty popped up behind me not 10 minutes later. Then Danny decided to drop by for Yong's salty peanuts. Hanz came by afterwards mumbling something. Nobody paid him any attention. 5 of us started doing what everyone else does at this time.
   5 phones came flying out. FB was duly updated with selfies and whatnot's.
   Things were pretty calm till 0330 hours.
   Then the mayhem started. Checking in 15 bikes at the counter was funny for us and the check-in crew. Nobody knew what to do. Lotsa talking and finger pointing finally got us through with lotsa spare kilos to kill. Fong was disappointed. He would have brought more things if he knew we had so much leftover allowances.
   Into the departure hall. Everyone was ever so kind and polite. Started the usual hellos and hi. Tried to put a face to the name that was thrown about. Yong continued offering his peanuts to anyone brave enough to take it up. Straightforward run to the plane. Departed. Off we went. Headed North towards Sumatra.
   Right on the dot. We landed in Kuala Namu Airport Medan. A brand spanking new airport. Mighty impressed when the door was thrown open. A world of difference from the old Polonia Airport i landed upon 29 years back. Like obedient cattles, we headed to the immigration for our stamp collection.
   Waited for our bikes at the collection ramp and it came after a bit of nail biting. Waited a wee bit more for the luggage to pop up. Gerard started his pacing. Dotty visited the toilet for the fourth time. Yong grinned. KC took another selfie.
   After about an hour, all luggage's and bikes were accounted for. Gerard said something to someone about something. We started to head towards the door. Gerard started to sweat and mumbled something in Hokkien. The herd stopped in it tracks. Gerard did not get his IKEA bag. His riding gear and spare tyres were inside the IKEA bag. Pete stared at Gerard's waist. Fong wandered off somewhere.
   Took us about an hour of waiting and toilet visiting. Finally, it was confirmed by the ground crew. Gerard would have to wear the same clothes for the entire tour. Yong took out his peanuts. Dotty ran off to the toilet for the 5th time in an hour. With as much coxing as the ground crew could do. The IKEA bag refused to leave KLIA willingly. So it was with much regret , the IKEA bag stayed back in KLIA while Gerard was enjoying Yong's peanuts en route. Somebody farted. We headed towards the door. Gerard wanted to hold on to the trolley till he got his bag. KC gently told him to let go. KC mentioned something about growing old and taking Cialis as a counter measure.

Circus is in town.

   Cleared immigration and we found the transport ready for us at the arrival hall. One nice yellow lorry and two lovely looking van. Up and inside we clambered in. I got to ride shotgun. :)
   Towards Medan we headed for our first meal. Pretty much an uneventful ride into town. Did the usual Asian touristy thing. Started searching for mobile card to activate FB and Candy Crush. Managed to secure the so precious mobile kit as soon as we arrive in Medan. Fong was on hunger strike until we got him his mobile kit. Had our first Chinese meal in Medan at the restaurant next door.
   Lunch was forgettable.
   Gerard thought it would probably be a wee bit impolite to been seen wearing the same riding gear for 5 days. So, off he went to search for a fresh new set of Toba sponsored riding gear to compliment him being here. Took him a bit of rummaging but he finally found something that fits him and did not cost him an arm or kidney.
   Away we go in our pretty white vans.

   Our guide Mr Bloom, took us on a small detour to visit the local Chinese temple. Lovely place. Medan is home to many ethnic Chinese. Therefore, you will come across quite a number of beautifully constructed temples. We came to the most elaborate temple. Did the touristy thing. Snapped some photos. Left the temple after everyone managed to log in to their FB and did the selfie thing. KC took another 11 selfie. Dot found the toilet.

Medan

   Off we went up into the mountains. The road heading towards Lake Toba was every bit the as it was 20 odd years ago. Nothing changed. It was exactly how i remembered it. Roads were still narrow. Drivers were all still World Rally Champion retirees. Pedestrians were very firm believers in God. Gerard said something. Pete changed his profile to green instead of yellow. Dotty wanted to pee again. And i rode shotgun... Oh yeahh.
   An hour of utter silence.
   We finally arrived at Parapat jetty. Hanz decided to start breathing again and finally let go the door handle. Jumped off the van and everyone started to congratulate each other for being alive still. Yong went off searching for more peanuts. Gerard tried to locate his IKEA bag using GPS. KC took 39 selfies. Fong was wondering why there is an ocean on a volcano. Herb wanted his beer. Fredo said something in Teochew. Dotty found her toilet. Watching the herd trying align itself, i could only smile. This will be an interesting trip. Especially Gerard, riding commando for 3 days. His nuts will be right and properly tested. Let the ride begin i say...!!!
   Into the ferry we hopped. This will be a 30 minute boat ride to our stay for the night. Pretty sights aplenty along the way. The water was pristine still . Same as it was when i last came to visit. "Pulo Samosir" blasting on the speaker... Smiles aplenty. Dotty came out from the toilet smilling. Herb couldn't believe that beer was not available en route. Fredo could only offer him a pat on the back.
   Arrived at Tuk Tuk Resort. Pretty awesome looking place. Obediently we jumped off the boat and waited to be called up for our designated room.

Tuk Tuk Resort.

   Chairman laid out the rooms and off we went to pee, fart and poo.
   An hour later. Everyone decide the time was right and off we went for our real motive coming to Toba. BINTANG Beer. Herb was grinning like a virgin on his wedding night 40 odd years ago. Fredo smiled. Fong was still staring at the volume of water in front of him. Gerard tried tracing his IKEA bag again. Dot found the resort toilet. Happy bunch of senior campers...
   Found a little hippy cafe by the lakeside. ONARI Cafe. The rest of the 3 hours was a blur of beer, pork curry , and lotsa shouting in hokkien and cantonese. KC was adamant we all read up on Cialis. Fredo smiled for the second time. Fong continued staring confusingly at the lake. KC took 35 selfies. Someone asked if we should head back and perhaps try to set up the bike so we can take photos of the bike as proof on FB. That someone almost got lynched by the Kepong old boys. Another someone snapped photos.
   Reluctantly we paid our bills and headed back towards the resort. Utter silence.

This is what we do during a bike tour.

   It was an hour of madness as boxes were torn open. Bikes claimed. Somebody farted again. Dotty had to pee. KC busy taking more selfies. This is how anarchy works eh... Somehow we managed to organise all 15 bikes for group photo session just right before nightfall. Got the last bike sorted by 1830hour. Off we went back to our room for a shower and a poo. Then it was off to Jenny's for dinner.
   The herd were aiming for the beer more than food i think. Nobody was interested in what they serve at Jenny's. Only question heard was, " Make sure the beer is nicely chilled please..."

   Dinner was as crazy stupid as it can get.

Calm before the storm.

   I have never in my life waited for a storm to arrive before finally eating my BBQ pork dinner all drenched and wet. For the first time in my life, i actually had to put on a raincoat to protect my dinner from the rain pouring in. Rain came before food came. And by God, it poured cats, dogs and poodles.... We were huddled in a little hipster hut. All 15 drenched and soaked. And the food was nothing to shout about. My pork tasted more like a Pomeranian than a pig.
   Meh...
   Dinner done. We trooped back wet and drunk for more drinks at our rooms. Whisky solves a lot of grievances and broken hearts. For Gerard even more so, he could not decide on whether he should be going commando the next day or just wait and pray for his lost IKEA bag to miraculously pop up tomorrow morning. Yong took out more peanuts. Fong continued staring at the lake. KC tried his best to find his stash of Cialis.
   Finally called it a night after a few shots of whisky...

Day 2:- Tuk Tuk Resort to Pangururan Resthouse.

Views galore.

   Bright and shine.
   Breakfast served. Simple fried rice and egg. Yummy. Smiles all around.
   Good news for Gerard, IKEA bag located and found! Only problem was, the bag missed the flight and is still having a gala time in KLIA. After some deliberation, Gerard decided he will brave himself and go commando instead of waiting for his IKEA bag. Gave instruction for the disobedient bag to be detained in KLIA till he returns.
    Today's ride was originally planned for 65km, but over night, El' Captain decided the extra 23km was unnecessary and decided we will be doing 47km instead for today. Everyone said ok. Even Gerard.
   The route will be fairly flat and scenic. Lotsa villages to pass by and even a beach to stop for coffee. Dotty visited the toilet. Fong remains preplexed. KC insisted we gather for a wefie and pose the sideways Superman thingy. I wanted to kick someone.
   Tuk Tuk to Pangururan. 47km.
   Away we go.
   And scenic it was. Paddy fields. Quaint villages. A million kids smiling and waving their hands. I must have high fived about 100 kids. My face was frozen from so much smilling. All the ladies at their doorway peering out at the circus passing by town. Wonderful route to cycle and see the local scenery by bike. Water buffaloes grazing . Dogs sleeping drunk by the roadside. Angry chickens. Green green paddy fields with the mountain as a backdrop. It was all bliss...
   After a bit, the Circus decided to stop for coffee and a bit of snack. Came across this little shack and the local guys calling us to stop for coffee. Took up their offer. That decision changed our life. It traumatized a few more than others.
   We were the typical clueless tourist from Mars.
   Walked in to the hut innocently and started ordering the coffee and tea. Plenty chatter. No one paying any attention. Till Claude decided to visit the kitchen for a peek of what's being cooked.
   She came out green as a Martian.
   This quaint little hut serves Poodle Curry. And in Toba it's called B1 meat.
   We were all lost for words. Considering this bunch of chatter boxes, that would be quite a statement. No one knew how to react. Hanz decided to explore further. He found all four paws on the chopping board right behind the stove. Fredo walked to the loo and saw the pit where the poodle was BBQ. Like a deer staring into headlamps, no one knew what was best to say at this point. I was honestly a wee bit off balanced. I knew about dogs being consumed on some parts of the island. But, having to look at it with my own eyes was a really strange experience altogether. I was both curious and confused. El' Captain wiped his mouth. Fong mumbled something.  Claude continued shaking and hopping around outside the shack. Me and VT could only smiled at each other.

Scoody Doo Curry.

   We tried our best to stay calm and not cause further drama. Claude and Hanz were pacing around like a pair of headless chicken. Both were unsure whether sitting or squatting would be best. Herb decided ordering a plate of fried noodles would help. Noodles came. A few dug in. A slight pause.
   The meat tasted funny, to put it mildly. Herb stopped grinning. Me and VT smiled at each other again. This trip is turning out to be more than fun.
   After about an hour of awkward chatter, we decided it was probably best to carry on with the tour and enjoy the scenery.


   More paddy fields and kids walking along the narrow road.
   Then we arrived at Pasir Putih beach. Decided to explore it and soak in the view. Interesting beach. Sandy volcanic pebbles. Almost still water. Spoke to a few tiny fishes we saw swimming along. Did the touristy thing. Took a million photos. KC did what he does best. More selfies. Then it was time to go.
   Another hour of riding along quaint village road took us to our destination today. Pangururan.
   Grabbed some lunch at the local Minangkabau stall. Rest house was only next door.
   Lunch done. Checked in to the rest house.
   Walking in to the rooms was an eye opener. Pete and me looked at each other in utter disbelief. Room is absent of a fan, air conditioning, tv and table. Toilet was as bare as it could be. There was only a ladle in the toilet. Nothing else. Naa daa.. Zero. No soap. No shampoo. No hot water. No sitting toilet. No flush EVEN. This is gonna be interesting. Lets check the groupchat!!
   As expected. Gerard was on the chat before anyone else. Gerard thought he landed in Twilight Zone and someone was playing another round of joke on him after the IKEA bag episode. Herb was next. Turns out, squatting play a huge obstacle for these old goats. Most can squat. None can stand back up.
   We might need to get the concierge to provide us with either a forklift or a couple of butt plugs. I did not know if i should be enjoying this in private or laugh out loud in public. I for one will not go rescue a stinky old dude stuck in a squat position with an unflushed toilet bowl. Give me poodle curry anytime...!!!
   An hour into the confusion, someone decided we should go drown our confusion in the local hot spring located 3km away in the mountains. So off we went.

En Route Pangaruran

  Pretty uneventful ride to the hot springs. Arrived. Paid our fee and randomly jumped into one of the pool. Not as boiling hot as the one i experienced in Taiwan. My nuts did not get cooked. It felt nicely warm and toasty. The rest seemed to be happy soaking themselves in the hot sulphuric water. Spent almost an hour playing stinky hot water with stinky old folks before we decided to head back.
   Dinner was ... meh.
   Dinner took 90 minutes to be served. Poor old Pete almost died of starvation. My first time watching a starving Hainanese. Can't quite blame him. The fried rice looked as happy as Gerard.
   We did the best we could with the sorry dinner. Headed off to try the local durians instead. Bought a couple of it for dessert. Returned to the rest house and found the rest of the herd also enjoying the durian. A bit of chatter before we switched off for the night.
 
Day 3:- Pangururan return loop to Tuk Tuk Resort.
 
   Rise and Shine...!
   It will be a 57km ride today. With a nice 25km uphill climb right smack at the beginning. We were jumping in blind. No one asked how long this was gonna take us. Someone farted again. KC as usual said something before taking out his mobile for selfies galore. We obediently complied. Rain drizzled down as we took off.
   Road condition was pretty bad. Potholes. Wet muddy road. In silence we rode for about 30 minutes. The usual scene of locals up and about their morning business. Staring at the bunch of clowns on bikes passing by.
   We smelled it before seeing it.
   A boy was roasting a dog by the roadside.
   My mind went blank for the rest of the day.
   KC took 4 photos of course.

   It was a long climb up to the peak. 1648meters.
   Passed by about 30 water buffaloes. 3 lakes on the hills.Yep. 3 lakes on top of an extinct volcano. Go figure. Me and Pete were equally confused. Road condition was really good. Wind chilly. Almost zero sun. Was a wonderful day for climb. We were blessed and lucky. Stopped at a few vantage points to take in the view of the distant mountains covered in clouds. Passed by a couple of villages. The kids, as usual were excited to see the circus passing by. More high fives. More photos. Then it continued upwards for the next hour or so.

   Arrived at the peak, found a hut for us to grab some local snacks. We cleaned out the kitchen. Finished most of the instant noodles and heaven sent coffee. Spent a bit more time viewing the lake from the hut. You could see all the way to Parapat from where we were. Beautiful sight indeed...
   Time to go down the mountain. Stopped a bit to enjoy the waterfall along the way before another 30 minutes of continuous downhill towards Tumuk.

Waterfall...

   Tumuk is a small town that caters to the locals for their daily needs. Came into the local market. Everything you would expect to see is sold. Lotsa fruits. Vegetables. Chickens dead and alive. Passed by the discharging jetty for vehicles as well. Congested. Plenty traffic. We quickly made our way out of town and headed back towards Tuk Tuk. Our destination for the day. Dotty needed the toilet. Fong couldn't wait to go stare at the lake again.



   Arrived back at Tuk Tuk and the Resort Manager Mr Bloom was surprised to see us coming in so early. He was expecting us arriving much later. Considering the climb we had to commit. He walked away in shock. The group quickly adjourned to their rooms for a quick wash up. Beer awaits. Everything else can wait.
   It was a continuous flow of beer from tea time till dinner. More beer at the resort reception with Mr Bloom. Guitar came. KC stopped taking photos. A lot of howling and screaming... Herb even attempted to do a bit of macarena. I held in my fart. Yong was grinning like a deflowered hippy. More howling....
   Mr Bloom was in such a pleasant mood, he even offered to teach us how to sing a Batak song. And the song goes like this.

   " Lisoi... lisoii... lisoiiiii....lalalala Lisoii LISOII!!!!!!..."

   Repeat it as much as you want.
   I honestly believe Mr Bloom gave us a pile of bullshit with that song. How selfish of him not to share what he smoked earlier. It would have been more believable if we were all stoned together. Monkey fella...

   We kept the resort awake that night. Whisky and beer flowed... It was a blur for me.
   Somehow, we finished the drinks and crawled back to our bed to rest for the next day.
   145km . Oh boy.... I visited the toilet twice before i slept.
   Fear.
   Keeps you awake i learn.

Day 4:- Simpang Kawat to Tanjung Balai.
 
   Bright and sunny.
   Over drinks and dinner last night. Someone managed to convince the Chairman that we would probably be better off using a transport to get to the peak of the volcano before attempting to ride the rest of the way to the coast within a day and hopefully not suffer any puncture or collapsed lungs. Chairman thought for 2 minutes and agreed. We decided to call Mr Bloom.
   Mr Bloom managed to secure 2 van to collect us and a lorry to pick up the bikes. We shall all hopefully rendezvous again at the peak.
   So into the 2 little van we squeezed in.
   The ride up the hill was as silent as a dead winter's night. Pete's eyes have never been bigger. Hanz was whimpering like a kitten on heat. Yong held on to his grin for the longest time ever. KY was slightly lost and confused. Me? I rode shotgun again...
   I could have died a few times before we arrive at the peak. Never have i been so close and intimate with the rear end of a lorry. I could literally lick the rear lamps if i wanted to. Parapat driver's must be really skillful or they are really in a hurry to poo. It was as close as you can get to riding in a rally car up Monaco. Except this is a minivan with Indonesian pop songs blaring in the back. I didn't know what to do. I could only hope the guys in the other van were shitting in their pants. That would scare me ....
   So we arrived at the destination in one piece. Within minutes, the other van came barrelling  down and shot past us. Within seconds, they came flying back to meet us. Chairman was riding shotgun. I was never more pleased to see that. Cialis... hmmphh. Let's see if his Cialis claim will do him good on this bat out of hell ride.
   Chairman was perplexed when he climbed down the van. He did not know if he should be swearing in Hokkien, Cantonese, English or Pidgin. I was more than amused. Fredo said something in Teochew before running off to the toilet. Everyone else was busy congratulating each other for being alive and not shitting in their pants. Our biggest achievement by far....!!!
   Van and lorry took off. So it was now down to getting the bikes set up correctly and getting all our fluids prepped for the 120km ride to the coast. Took off at 0930 hours. Shopkeepers and bystanders gave us a wave and a cheeky smile.

120km to the coast.

   It was a long long long ride...
   Never believe anyone when they tell you its a downhill loop. Every time someone says that to you. They are merely trying to tell you , you are pretty much screwed....
   We rode and rode. We climbed and climbed. It was a long ride. Through plantations. Villages. More plantations. Villagers shaking their in disbelief when they found out where we were headed to. Most just smiled politely before laughing after we pass.
   I have never seen so many cows in my entire life. The road was long , pebbled and hot. The herd mostly kept quiet for the first half of the day. Herd referring to the cyclist. The cows were busy grazing and giving us funny looks. Took a short and quick lunch at one of the roadside stall before continuing on.
   Rode through a village with kids swimming in the drain. The drain was the main irrigation system for their farm. Upon returning home, i realised. This was a passing moment i will regret for a long time. I should have stopped and taken my time. Never will i have the same opportunity to join the kids for a swim in their drain ever again. The water was almost crystal clear. Cool and welcoming. The kid's, they looked like they were having the time of their life. I should have jumped in...sigh.
   And we continued plodding on for the next hour.

   It was almost dusk when we spotted the signage pointing us to the coast. Claude was so happy to see it, she decided to hug Kelvin with her bike. Both went tumbling. Yong continued grinning. No one got hurt. And away we pedaled. Not long and we arrived at our rest house in Tanjung Balai. Dotty did what she does best. Visit the toilet again.
   We rode for 9 hours. Stopped for lunch twice. Stopped for drinks 3 times. Waved to 300 cows. Made 4 right turns and one left turn for the entire 116km of road.
   Pretty amazing....!!!
   Now that i am back home sitting on my still sore butt typing this out. I can't help but smile at how reckless we were. 116km with panniers and riding without GPS. We were as foolish as kids. But hey....I loved it!!!
   Dinner was served village style. Fried chicken to be eaten with your hands and warm tea drank from the bag without straws. The herd was so exhilarated they could be eating Scooby Curry and no one would raise an eyebrow.
   Had coffee with Pete, Yong and KY after dinner. We were just smiling and laughing at how silly we were. Attempting to ride 145km to the coast and whatnot. Thank god we had a wee bit of sense left and took the lesser option. It was still a ride to remember for a long time coming.
   The next day was another adventure altogether. A 5 hour ferry ride back to Port Klang...
   Oh boy.

Day 5:- Tanjung Balai to Port Klang.
 

Local Delight.

   Day started with a dose of local nasi lemak. Piping hot and spicy. The herd were in a cheerful mood. Another 7km ride to the jetty and we will get to cross the Straits of Malacca by ferry.
   The ride to the jetty was scenic and dusty. This being a port town still developing. Everything was chaotic. Bikes all over, total ignorant of traffic rules. Lotsa honking and people staring at the circus passing by. I can't help grinning.
   Arrived at the jetty and it was a 2 hour wait before we get loaded into the steel banana for the high speed run across the straits. More selfies and chatter. Fong insisted this was the same water he had been staring at for the past 3 days. He wants his money back. Gerard still couldn't decide on the Cialis recommendation.

   "10mg enough meh? Sure or not?"

   Ferry came and into the ferry we clambered in. Ok. Pretty funky looking ferry with all the rainbow covered seats and diesel fumes. We will either throw up from the waves pounding us or the diesel fumes emanating from the engine. The herd settled in and within minutes, the ferry took off slowly.
   Pretty uneventful run across the straits. We had good weather and almost zero waves. Before long , we were within sight of Port Klang. Home sweet home....
 

Failed marriage proposal.

   All in, this was an absolute fun trip. Everyone had a gala time riding and soaking in the scenery. We must have had a 100 bottles of Bintang Beer. High fived a few hundred school kids. Winked at a hundred cows and water buffaloes. And cursed a million times for having to ride up 1648 meters. Learn ONE Batak word.
   But hey.
   It was heck of fun and i will willingly do this again. Only the next time, i swear. You WILL find me swimming in the drain with the kids...

   Liii Soiiii....!!!

   'Unbelievable.

My best new found friend.

Toba souvenir.

 

10th Dec 2017 KDCF ride hosted by Borky

Sunday Ride Invitation by Master Bork:-
 
   What a strange turn of events. The ride was initiated by our resident Hobbit at the beginning of the week. Despite repeated invites and messages, we only saw 4 willing participants register and commit themselves to the ride. I wasn't sure if i would join a ride where the median rider height was one inch short of five feet. I was never most comfortable being a minority. Feels weird looking down when i talk. So i kept that to meself and decided i will think about it.
   Come Sunday and i thought i might just nosey up to the ride and say hello to my Hobbit buddy for a bit. Woke up, did the usual business. Loaded the bike and off i went to make up the numbers. Pretty uneventful drive. Got there right on the dot and lo and behold.....
   There was easily 15 riders waiting and grinning like drunken billy goats.
   I was shocked.
   Then Rob the Nose drove up 3 inches to my right foot and smiled.
   I did not know what to do.
   Took a good 5 minutes before i came out of my daze and started making headcounts. Counted 20 riders. Whoa.... What's going on here? I even saw the old dino peeking out from the side. And Gerard. And VH. And even the blue birdman. Halloween went past ya? Why are all these godforsaken characters here ? On a quiet Sunday morning... How odd.
   Borky said something. Everyone smiled. Off we went.
   300 meters into the trail. The Nose decided he needed to speak to his rear brakes. 100 meters later he stopped to lecture it sternly. Another 100 meters and things came to a complete stop.
   Me being the nosey one decided to stop and stare.

   "Umm... Pat. Would you by any chance have any spare brake fluids? I think i am short of it. Rear brakes are bonking out. Can't seem to make it do any stopping today."
   
   Ummm... i was undecided. Should i attempt to reason with this fella or just slap him across the face?
   Why would he think i will be carrying spare Shimano Mineral Brake Fluid?
   I decided to be civil and i smiled. Then i attempted to slap him. Missed the chance as he bent down to search for fluid on the wet muddy ground. The Nose started giving the brake a nose job. Stripped everything out from the caliper. Then took out a spare set of brake pads with rubber bands melted onto it. Started carving the brake pads and mumbled something in cantonese. I could only watch in silence. He had a knife with him. I could not for the life of me smile or shake my head in disbelief.
   After 20 minutes of fiddling with his rear end, up came the old Dino. Seems he was lost. Pointed him in the correct direction and off he went. We started packing up all the tools. Not 5 minutes later, the old Dino showed up again. Told us he is not feeling so good in the nuts and wanted to abandon the ride. Pointed him in the direction to return to the car and off we went.
   In silence we rode. Not a squeak as we tried to overtake a poodle and 3 hikers. 15 minutes of climbing up the hill and we spot the same old Dino right in front of us.
   Huh?
   Looked at each other and decided to take our chances.

  " Is that you Jason?? Why are you here? Weren't you headed out to the car??..."

   It seems he got lost again. And by some miracle, ended up on a hill in front of us. And he did not even see the bloody poodle. Told him it was probably best for him to follow us all the way to the hut. At the very least , we could use him as an excuse for being so far behind.
   Arrived at the regrouping point. Tried our best to explain exactly what happened. Not one person believed me. They were unconvinced for a good 14 minutes. Then the proof came.

   A poodle was what it took for them to believe me. I wanted to strangle the little rat.

   After the obligatory photo sessions, off we went towards Serenity. Dino took the other way back towards the car. Fairly smooth riding all the way towards the junction of Sahabat where we waited to regroup. Backmarkers came and off the Leader Bork went. With the rest tagging along quietly.
   Grouchy took one crank of his bike and the bike stopped in protest. Refuses to move. Grouchy tried talking to it, after watching Rob doing this earlier. Tried again. Bike remains steadfast. Shook it a bit. We were getting a bit amused watching this circus act. Grouchy bow and offered the bike a branch. No change.
   The Nose decided this what getting nowhere. Stepped in and politely told the Grouchy that offering a flimsy branch to a bike with the chain stuck between the sprocket and spokes will not work.

   "Oh..."

   Took the 4 of us a good 30 minutes and a lot of swearing in Cantonese.

   Off we went trying to locate the main pack. Finally caught up with the pack at the regular school shed. Tried my best to explain to the slimy KY that we were held back by Grouchy and his chain. He threw me an ice cream and told me to shut up. Between a cold ice cream and trying to reason with an old fart. I chose the ice cream. I really like ice cream.

   After another round of chit chatting and bullshitting, the main pack decided to continue with the ride. I had to abandon the ride halfway. Have you seen the sad face a hound dog pulls on you when he is having constipation?
   Well, i didn't wanna kick Rob in the butt. So i decided to do the right thing and cut short me ride. Took a quiet leisurely ride back towards the car. Arrived at the car, packed up and off we went to Subaidah for the after ride drinks. This time around, lunch would be served for free.      Compliments of Grouchy's bike.
  Lovely Sunday ride indeed.


   Un'believeable.

Photos courtesy of Nat.

The Man from Bromo...

22nd and 24th November 2017 Weekday ride Kiara:-
 

Cross Roads Wefie

   The long awaited weekday ride with Antony finally came. The Penghulu from Malang came for a stopover ride with us after his Chiang Mai trip. The goats have been told of his arrival and started making plans to host our friend for Kiara and KDCF.

   Time decided and ride location planned for the first introductory ride. KIARA.
   Antony did the Malaysian thing for his first ever ride in Malaysia, he was late.
   There we were, 4 old goats standing and kicking stones at the bikewash. And our guest was nowhere to be seen. The Manta looked like he was drowning. Bulldozer wanted to go...well, bulldoze something. Hanz kept grinning for reasons known only to himself. No one wanted to ask him why he was mimicking a starving hyena. Me, i was getting worried. Being in the company of restless old people scares me plenty. Old people either faints or starts foaming at the mouth if left to their own idle mind for too long. Neither of which i am fond of watching. So i decided it was probably best that we find out where this Antony fella actually was. I hope he is actually in Malaysia. People do confuse coming to Malaysia and Singapore seeing that we are that close. Hanz called, first signs were good. He is in KL. Second sign, he is awake.
   After 3 minutes of chatter, turns out Antony is doing the exact nonsense we do. Go eat first. This fella learns very quickly i thought. Only 23 hours upon touch down and he has picked up so much.
   So with a brief consultation among the old goats, we decided to take off for our ride. Let Antony search for us in the trail.
   The usual Office trail to warm up. Then into Coronary for a wee bit of climbing. Up the tarmac towards Magic Carpet. Into Magic and up to Magic Circle before we came out at the tarmac for Manta to catch his breath. Sat down for a bit of hellos and chats.
   We heard him before we actually saw him. Antony was seen walking and shaking his head. Manta did the first thing every mountain biker does upon seeing a fellow buddy in distress. Manta took out his phone.
   "Hi Antony...! Look up. I have you on video. Try not to pant so much. Go on. Continue walking. Just two more switchbacks and you will be out. "
   We all smiled. It was a moment all of us looked forward to. This will be spoken about for the next 3 months whenever we think of Antony. Even Bulldozer stopped kicking pebbles and came over to watch.

   "Morning guys...."

   We waited a good 20 minutes before our guest could recall where he was on a Wednesday morning. Life is good indeed. None of us could speak Javanese, therefore we could not comfort our guest. All we could do was smile and offer him sticks to throw.

Plan C enterance.

   After 30 minutes of chatter, we decided to head into 2K. Short little spurt and we ended up at the cross roads. Took some time and photos for evidence. Then it was decided that the young ones head into Mission Reverse while Manta and Bulldozer went off to the retirees trail. Off we went.
   Antony came out of Mission with a huge smile on his face.
   "That was good. The downhill and switchbacks ...fantastic!"
   Tarmac up towards Barrakuda and we caught up with Manta. As usual, Manta has an apple and was halfway chewing it when we arrive. Apple break it is then. More chit chat and it was decided we head towards Plan C via Wasteland. Into Wasteland we went. Up towards reservoir and the group emerged at the tarmac. Did the usual Plan C loop and came back to the tarmac within a good 30 minutes. Antony looked like he was having fun. He couldn't figure out the climbing part though. He was looking high and low for the support lorry.
   " You mean we will have to ride back UP where we just came down from?"
   We could only smile.
   Short break and off we went back towards Wasteland before heading back to the cars.
   It was a short and sweet ride. Met old friends, hosted a buddy. Watch monkeys. Monkeys watched us. We both shook our heads. Kiara on a Wednesday. Who would have thought.

24th November KDCF.

He doesn't know yet...

   Friday. The ride was set at 1430 hours. Another odd time set by Manta. Retirees do go by their own quirky schedules. All we could do was smile.
   Arrived at 1400 hours. Saw a few early birds already at the car park. Waved and smiled at each other. Antony came out from Ben's car with a huge grin. Manta arrived. Then Guinness rolled in. Did the usual pre-ride chatter before we took off into KDCF.
   Not much said among the old goats. Nothing much can be said when you have to climb for a good 45 minutes in the humid secondary forest.

First stop.

   I only saw Unker stopped once to pee. Then the second time to burp. And the third time to get Guinness to stop so he has someone to talk to. I could only continue walking away in silence. Manta was further down talking to Tailook. I was utterly alone. Oh well... i continued walking. A good few silent moment passed before i emerge from the bush to see the group panting at the hut. Waited for the back markers to arrive for the customary photo taking session. I must have had my photos taken at the very same spot for the 48th time. Dementia can be very painful. Manta kept insisting we take the photo. Even when i reminded him that this will be the 49th time coming this year alone.

Second stop.

   Short apple break and off we went towards Serenity. The group took off and Manta had no other choice but to put his camera away. Up we went. More silence as the group tried their best not to faint and fart. Unker stopped again to pee.

   Caught up with the group at the enterance to Serenity. A brief headcount and off we went.
   Everyone emerged from Serenity with a smile. Antony was so happy he decided to snap his bike chain and walk the last 200 meters of Serenity. For camaraderie's sake, all of us stood by while we help watch Antony fix his chain. Done and dusted within minutes, into Salleh we went. Came out at the school for our next gossip stop. Antony was grinning ear to ear.

   " This is fun. I really enjoy this trail. Though the first climb very nearly killed me. I really enjoy this trail. "



   More chit chat and gossip before the group headed into Scouts to do the downhill bit towards our car. Manta looked like he was turning green. I decided to accompany him and we took the road back. Not nice to let the old fella mumble alone while cycling on the road. People will stare.

   Arrived at the car park and started preparing for the guys to return. Took another good hour before the first rider came out covered in mud. Looks like they had plenty fun washing their bikes later.
   Beer was served. All is good.





26th November Hash Ride:
   The guys decided to host Antony for his last ride here before he leaves for home. See photo collage below. It looked like he had fun too.

  It has been a memorable week for all. Having a fellow mountain biker here to ride our local trail has been a pleasure. Watching him suffer as we do on a weekly puts a smile on our face. This is why we ride.
   See you soon ... Next stop Bali!

   Un'believeable.

12th October 2017 Lazy Muck around ride.

   Another lazy Sunday...
   The entire bunch of goats went off to Semenyih for a revisit to one of our old Presidential trail. Wanted to join initially. However, the flu got the better of me. And old age. And laziness....
   It's been an awful month since returning from Bromo. For some reason, i couldn't bring myself to drive an hour in the dead of the morning for a ride on trail i rode numerous times. Hardly done any riding aside from 2 Kiara rides. It's gonna be a disaster when our buddy from Bromo drop in for his Kiara maiden ride. We are gonna be so screwed. I am hoping this Wednesday would be a good day to free load onto the Yellow Manta for a quick ride in Kiara. Otherwise, i may as well hang up the bloody bike for good.
   Woke up and sat around for a bit. Then it just got really boring after staring at the wall for a good 3 minutes. Grabbed the freshly built Stumpy and off i went. Wasn't quite sure where i was headed to. Hell, i just wanted to ride the bike somewhere before i go crazy from riding deprivations.
   Got out about 3km from the house. Came to a little bridge climb over the rail tracks. Kick the old Stumpy and it felt really weird. Cranked it a couple more times and decided it was probably best to check the bike out. Stopped at the bottom of the bridge and stared at the bike for a bit. Shook the crank and lo and behold. Bloody crank is swaying sideways. Damm. Thought i had that sorted out last week. Tried talking to it. Didn't work. Bounced it on the tarmac a few times. Didn't work. Took out the multi tool and spoke to it in a louder voice. Nope. Not working.

   Took a deep breath and hopped on to it. Hoping it will sort itself out after a few more minutes. Rode into the Malay Village to view some of the locals doing their shopping in the morning. Crank remains wonky. Took a turn into Sentosa hoping to meet some friends. Pedalled a few more clicks. Saw no one. Everyone must either still be asleep or have gone off to Semenyih.

   Decided to explore the place. Rode off in a general direction of the village pointing east. passed by a couple of freshly built houses. Followed the traffic and ended up on the other side of the village after a few minutes. Crank remains wonky.

   Oh well.... Let's head home via the railway tracks and see what we can do for the Stumpy. Took another 30 minutes before i finally got home. Sat the bike down in the garden and stared at it for a couple of minutes. This has got to be solved. Otherwise, it will be shit when i go riding up North.
   Decided to strip the Turner and Frankenstein the bike up.
   Voila.... sorted out within minutes.
   Now i know for sure. Truvativ cranks do not work with Shimanos. Bunch of monkeys. Can't these guys actually agree on a parallel size ? One fella has to get his crank spline 1mm smaller than the other so you can't cross over and share parts. Monkey's ass...

   The rest of the day went by in a blur.


   Then came across a buddy's posting on FB about a stray dog that he came across while riding. Charming little fella actually accompanied him up the hill for 8kms. Story got me smilling. That dog should be homed. Such a pity having that little fella all outside by himself. I would have taken him home.
   My thoughts went back to the strays behind my house.The strays in my place tries to nip off my ankles each time i pass them by. Those should be slapped some sense into them. Can't figure out why they are so angry all the time.

Unbelievable...

29th October 2017 Exploring ride around the local housing estate.

Muck around ride around the home ground.

   Woke up with a huge headache. Kiara plan cancelled within 2 seconds of getting out of bed. Decided it was not a good idea driving all the way with a leaky nose. Was all simply lazy really. Most of the old goats decided to go for the Hash ride somewhere in Rasa. Too hot a weather to drive 80km just to ride a trail i thought.
   Had my coffee and took the little ones out for their usual breakfast greet and meet at the local coffee shop.
Yadda yadaa... soccer mum duties till lunch time.
   Sat down at home at 1500 hours and stared at the wall for a few minutes. Open a can of beer perhaps?
Decided against it. Bloody fridge was too far away. Kicked a few pillows around and sat down again.
   "What the heck...."
   Threw on the helmet and gloves. Decided to go roaming around the neighborhood and see what i can discover. Moved here about 5 years ago, never really rode around to see what is available. Would be good to just wonder around a bit till dinner time. Besides, the bike needed a setting in ride. Took along some tools.
   Here we go. Left or right?
   Left turn it is. Rode for 13 feet and came across 2 mutts guarding the junction. They took one look at me and decided it would be fun to chase a barely warmed cyclist down the road for a bit. Bunch of monkeys. They really chased me for a good 5 minutes.

   Took me right to the riverside.Stopped to adjust my rear shock. Then took off riding again. Saw 2 more black mutts hiding under the car. Thought to myself, this will be ok. They are under the car after all. Rode past the car. And out they came. Charging at me like i rode over their bloody tail. What's going on today?
This pair chased me for a good 60 feet. Only backed off after i took out my pump and waved it at them.


   Can't believe my luck today. I was only out riding for 20 minutes and already got chased twice. Was it the pants?
   Rode along the river side. Looking around at people with their evening activities. Came across a little Indian temple and skipped across to look at it. Immediately, out came charging a brown mutt. What the hell.... Backed off and tried to move away. Bloody mutt came charging. Swung the pump at it and he finally took me seriously.
   This is really weird.
   Oh well. Shrugged and continued cycling...

   Took a turn. What do you see. 4 dogs. My lucky day... Of course they came charging . Again... After 2 minutes of raising my voice and screaming at them. I finally managed to ride away. Not without one mutt giving me the evil eye. I never hated dogs so much in my entire life.
   Decided it was probably better to head towards the Malay village and muck around there. I am pretty sure its safer there. Don't think i would get bullied by the resident stray cats i am sure.
   Took the track right beside the river and rode around peacefully for awhile. Came across a few kids who tried to challenge me to a smiling contest. Waved them off and went on my way.
   Saw a little hidden alley and decided to explore it. Came to a boom gate with a abandoned car. Dismounted and out came another mutt. This one was really upset. What the hell is it with the dogs today?? Yelled and waved my pump at it again. This one was really persistent. Came charging up to my pedals. Had no choice but to stand between the bike and cursed him in Hokkien. Cheeky fella even tried to nip my heel as i rode away.
   Finally entered the village. Peace of mind finally. No stupid PMS dogs in view. Rode right up to the sluice gate and a few guys fishing in the murky water.
   Looked at my watch and it was already 7ish.
   In total. I rode 10km. Took me almost 2 hours to do 10 clicks. Dismount like 100 times to confront about 14 dogs. What a day .... Kiara was probably safer by comparison.

   Unbelievable...

2nd August 2016 Tasik Biru Ghost Hunt

Ghost Hunting Ride :-

Tail lights...

   The warm up ride before Burung Hantu in October. Someone suggested, 20 agreed. So off we went to Tasik Biru in Sungai Buloh for a night ride. the idea was to test out the lights needed for the upcoming ride in Malacca. Also to check how many of the old folks needed new spectacles for night blurry vision. Our resident eye specialist Batman Tong was absent. However, we were sure he would welcome any extra business coming from this end of the rainbow. Slightly fading but still a rainbow nonetheless...

Ghost hunting begins.

   With the average median age within the riding group touching 50's now, poor eye sight is the current concern. Soon to be caught up by poor hearing. As concerned riding buddies, we will try to address one problem at a time. The current prevailing one was to avoid fellow riders riding into each other or reaching out for help and grabs another person's twinkie instead of his hand. Getting hold of a sweaty todger is the least thing i plan to do during this lifetime. Especially when the said todger belongs to a centurion.
   At 1900 hours, most riders were present and ready for the ride. Excitement and spirits were high. The group could barely wait for supper to come. Having roti canai after ride is very motivating indeed. So much so, the group had to be held back from rushing off into the darkness.
   Well, except for 2 old farts who decided to show up 30 minutes late.

   We waved good bye and wished them well. Off we went into the darkening skies following Tailook. A trail of blinkers lead into the oil palm estate which will be our playground for the next 5 hours.
   Trail was pretty much intact and remained the same since the last time we came for the ride. Except for a few bit that was flattened down and muddy. That was ok i guess, considering we still managed to squeeze out 30 clicks of night time riding that day. Pretty much palm oil trails the entire night. Flowy and smooth for most of the way. Rode through a couple of tunnels and climb up pretty much all the monsoon drain we could find and ended up in a petrol station right smack in the middle of nowhere. Which was a pretty welcomed treat really.

That is 100k worth of muddy bikes.

   Didn't think the station owner was pleased seeing 20 mud covered old chimps parked in front of his station drinking Coke at 11pm. He was mighty concerned. Can't quite blame him now can we? What was he to do if one old chimps decides to get a heart attack from drinking ice cold Coke and drops dead there and there itself? Would have been a mighty mess to clean up eh? I would be pissed if i were him... All the mud and sweaty jerseys to burn and get rid of. Disposing a sweaty muddy body would be asking too much in exchange for a can of Coke.

One chimp stops chewing his food.

   It was then that i noticed how well trained and conditioned these bunch of old chimps have become. I have never believed that it is possible to train a bunch of 50 year olds. What more, a bunch of 20 chimps. Together in a group.
   Watching on tv, the difficulties a shepherd had to endure to round up even a simple minded bunch of goats. I was amazed at how easy it was to round up this bunch of old chimps. You did not have to shout. Or wave a stick at anyone. No need to make threats or fists waving. It was almost magical really.
   To get the group to shut up and get in line. All you need to do is...

11 well behaved chimps.

More well trained chimps.

   Whip out your phone and offer to take photos.

Even the mighty caveman froze for the camera.

   You can almost stop planet earth from spinning i tell you. Everything comes to a complete standstill. Circus monkeys would be put to shame.
   It is amazing what a mobile phone camera can do these day and age. The chimps goes into a trance like motion. Without being told, every chimp would stop whatever it was doing and pose for the camera. A buck naked Pamela Anderson appearing then and there itself would be ignored. This phenomenon should be studied. I mean seriously looked into.
   I really really like Pamela.

   Un'believeable...