It was a disaster. Even before the ride took off, everything that could go wrong went wrong. Murphy came to visit.
What was supposed to be a birthday bash ride turned into a circus. Counted a bunch of goats at the meeting point. Said hello and hi, walked into the mamak to get my breakfast. Sat down and waited patiently. I was early, so coffee was the only thing on my still sleeping head. Watched the goats perform their pre-ride ritual. The usual routine. Polish bike. Lube chain. Choi putting on make up. KY talking to his son, his son looking at the distance nodding to him. Jesse speaking to his knee.
My breakfast came. That's when the circus started.
Jesse came in and tried to get a shower with the roti canai dhall curry. Everything flew. Jesse screamed like a girl on heat. Indian men almost gave Jesse a hug. VH of course ran for cover. VC stood up ready with his teeth clenched. Pete almost choked on his bread. CH kept his grin on. KY had to comfort his son.
Managed to restore order. Jesse tried to explain what he did. Everyone nodded and said ok. Someone reminded him to pay for the roti he spilled on the floor. And stay in his seat till we have all left. I held on to my roti with dear life.
Choo came mumbling something in Cantonese. He couldn't drive in from Kemuning because there was a fun run going on. Poor fella had to make a 15km detour. Unker offered him coffee. Choo farted his gratitude. Then Lina called. She was also caught in a jam. PJ marathon. Unker wanted to tell Lina that we are 30km away from PJ. What was she doing driving in PJ in circles? Lina hung up before Unker could ask. Lina walked in the mamak within seconds. Till now, we are unsure who was lying.
Breakfast done. Something said about the ride and 4 cartons of ice cold beer waiting for us if we do the loop and we took off. Headed towards Bukit Kemandol orang asli settlement.
We rode for 230 meters. Security Guard told us to stop at the boom gate. Guard on duty refuses to let us pass. Guard was firm. He was concern that we would be a danger to the fun runners coming our way at 10 am. I looked at my watch. It was 8:03 am. Unker tried to reason with the Guard. Guard refuses to believe that we were all there to attend a birthday party. Guard also did not believe that Chinese Men drinks beer on a Sunday.
Guard said something in Tamil which translates to..."You fellas don't lie to me. I've been around long enough. You Chinese fellas don't drink beer, Whisky maybe. But beer on a Sunday?? Please la Thamby."
We were all in shock...
How could he call Unker a Thamby?? Unker is easily 50 years old liao. Thamby? Kaw chorr aa...?
We walked across to the road running parallel to the boom gate and continued riding. We waved good bye to the Guard. Guard looked mighty pleased with himself. Unker's mouth was open and speechless for quite awhile.
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| First road block. |
Manta called Unker. Unker wasn't missing. Unker went back to the mamak to retrieve Grouchy. Grouchy was still asleep when we witnessed Jesse performing the roti dance. Grouchy decided to clear his bowels instead of rushing to be on time. Grouchy was late, and he did not even manage to switch on his GPS. Grouchy was still unsure if the GPS file was in gpx form or e file. Poor Grouchy. We were very sympathetic to his troubles. A few wanted to kick him. Someone suggested throwing his GPS up into the huge angsana tree and hope for the best. Hanz wanted to say something to Grouchy in Hakka which was very encouraging, if you want to challenge a Hakka to a fist fight that is...
Finally got the ride proper started.
It was 23km of going around in circles.
We rode into the palm oil plantation. Came to the first of 15 tea bushes. Stopped to take the first of the thousands of selfies. Continued riding. Came to the next round of tea bushes. Did the selfie thingy again. And that was that. 3 hours of riding in circles and taking selfies. KY Junior was on the verge of committing harakiri. Hanz was disappointed no one complimented him on how handsome and good looking he was. CH was still unsure on how he was going to explain his Gopeng trip cancellation to his wife due to stomach upset. VC was sure Croatia will be champions. VH said something to himself. Little Hanh kept grinning. Poor Borky was all alone with his pills. CEO was with us all in spirit, 45% proof. Oily flew us her airplane...
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| The look of joy... |
Someone finally said enough was enough. And we started heading back towards the car.
Unker was spoken to. He gave us assurance that the beer would definitely be cold and the curry chicken would be spicy and hot. The pack left Unker by the roadside.
The beer was ice cold.
Somebody bought KFC.
We ate our cake and sang Unker a song.
Un'believable.
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| Jesse enjoying the view. |
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| Pee contest . |
Manta.
Lite & easy ride this weekend at Saujana Putra as we went exploring a lovely loop set up by Unker Danny in his homeground designed specially to initiate beginners into the joy of mountain biking! Measuring a bit over 23km, the scenic singletrack led to a rather beautiful lake, probably an ex-mining pool.
And no big hills and every track was rideable as long as you are fit.
Of course highlight of the day was the party post-ride at Unker Danny's home to celebrate his 35th birthday. Many thanks for the free flow of beer and great spread of food and happy birthday again Unker.
Looking forward to the next beginners' or night ride there!
KY Chan.
Unker Danny Birthday Ride. Supposed to start early but as usual. Patrick Toh wanted his his milk tea and flooded roti delayed the start. Never knew there was a MTB gem right in the middle of Bandar Saujana Putra. After some commtion with a security guard who fear MTBiker run over pedestrians ( there was a run-with-me event. ) We snucked into a strangely beautiful MTB trails along some lakes, palm plantations, tea plantations, estate bungalow and orchards. The ride was pleasant and the trail certainly suit for PCC's newbie ride. The ride ended with a Birthday bash in Unker's home.
Happy birthday Unker Danny!
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