10th Dec 2017 KDCF ride hosted by Borky

Sunday Ride Invitation by Master Bork:-
 
   What a strange turn of events. The ride was initiated by our resident Hobbit at the beginning of the week. Despite repeated invites and messages, we only saw 4 willing participants register and commit themselves to the ride. I wasn't sure if i would join a ride where the median rider height was one inch short of five feet. I was never most comfortable being a minority. Feels weird looking down when i talk. So i kept that to meself and decided i will think about it.
   Come Sunday and i thought i might just nosey up to the ride and say hello to my Hobbit buddy for a bit. Woke up, did the usual business. Loaded the bike and off i went to make up the numbers. Pretty uneventful drive. Got there right on the dot and lo and behold.....
   There was easily 15 riders waiting and grinning like drunken billy goats.
   I was shocked.
   Then Rob the Nose drove up 3 inches to my right foot and smiled.
   I did not know what to do.
   Took a good 5 minutes before i came out of my daze and started making headcounts. Counted 20 riders. Whoa.... What's going on here? I even saw the old dino peeking out from the side. And Gerard. And VH. And even the blue birdman. Halloween went past ya? Why are all these godforsaken characters here ? On a quiet Sunday morning... How odd.
   Borky said something. Everyone smiled. Off we went.
   300 meters into the trail. The Nose decided he needed to speak to his rear brakes. 100 meters later he stopped to lecture it sternly. Another 100 meters and things came to a complete stop.
   Me being the nosey one decided to stop and stare.

   "Umm... Pat. Would you by any chance have any spare brake fluids? I think i am short of it. Rear brakes are bonking out. Can't seem to make it do any stopping today."
   
   Ummm... i was undecided. Should i attempt to reason with this fella or just slap him across the face?
   Why would he think i will be carrying spare Shimano Mineral Brake Fluid?
   I decided to be civil and i smiled. Then i attempted to slap him. Missed the chance as he bent down to search for fluid on the wet muddy ground. The Nose started giving the brake a nose job. Stripped everything out from the caliper. Then took out a spare set of brake pads with rubber bands melted onto it. Started carving the brake pads and mumbled something in cantonese. I could only watch in silence. He had a knife with him. I could not for the life of me smile or shake my head in disbelief.
   After 20 minutes of fiddling with his rear end, up came the old Dino. Seems he was lost. Pointed him in the correct direction and off he went. We started packing up all the tools. Not 5 minutes later, the old Dino showed up again. Told us he is not feeling so good in the nuts and wanted to abandon the ride. Pointed him in the direction to return to the car and off we went.
   In silence we rode. Not a squeak as we tried to overtake a poodle and 3 hikers. 15 minutes of climbing up the hill and we spot the same old Dino right in front of us.
   Huh?
   Looked at each other and decided to take our chances.

  " Is that you Jason?? Why are you here? Weren't you headed out to the car??..."

   It seems he got lost again. And by some miracle, ended up on a hill in front of us. And he did not even see the bloody poodle. Told him it was probably best for him to follow us all the way to the hut. At the very least , we could use him as an excuse for being so far behind.
   Arrived at the regrouping point. Tried our best to explain exactly what happened. Not one person believed me. They were unconvinced for a good 14 minutes. Then the proof came.

   A poodle was what it took for them to believe me. I wanted to strangle the little rat.

   After the obligatory photo sessions, off we went towards Serenity. Dino took the other way back towards the car. Fairly smooth riding all the way towards the junction of Sahabat where we waited to regroup. Backmarkers came and off the Leader Bork went. With the rest tagging along quietly.
   Grouchy took one crank of his bike and the bike stopped in protest. Refuses to move. Grouchy tried talking to it, after watching Rob doing this earlier. Tried again. Bike remains steadfast. Shook it a bit. We were getting a bit amused watching this circus act. Grouchy bow and offered the bike a branch. No change.
   The Nose decided this what getting nowhere. Stepped in and politely told the Grouchy that offering a flimsy branch to a bike with the chain stuck between the sprocket and spokes will not work.

   "Oh..."

   Took the 4 of us a good 30 minutes and a lot of swearing in Cantonese.

   Off we went trying to locate the main pack. Finally caught up with the pack at the regular school shed. Tried my best to explain to the slimy KY that we were held back by Grouchy and his chain. He threw me an ice cream and told me to shut up. Between a cold ice cream and trying to reason with an old fart. I chose the ice cream. I really like ice cream.

   After another round of chit chatting and bullshitting, the main pack decided to continue with the ride. I had to abandon the ride halfway. Have you seen the sad face a hound dog pulls on you when he is having constipation?
   Well, i didn't wanna kick Rob in the butt. So i decided to do the right thing and cut short me ride. Took a quiet leisurely ride back towards the car. Arrived at the car, packed up and off we went to Subaidah for the after ride drinks. This time around, lunch would be served for free.      Compliments of Grouchy's bike.
  Lovely Sunday ride indeed.


   Un'believeable.

Photos courtesy of Nat.

The Man from Bromo...

22nd and 24th November 2017 Weekday ride Kiara:-
 

Cross Roads Wefie

   The long awaited weekday ride with Antony finally came. The Penghulu from Malang came for a stopover ride with us after his Chiang Mai trip. The goats have been told of his arrival and started making plans to host our friend for Kiara and KDCF.

   Time decided and ride location planned for the first introductory ride. KIARA.
   Antony did the Malaysian thing for his first ever ride in Malaysia, he was late.
   There we were, 4 old goats standing and kicking stones at the bikewash. And our guest was nowhere to be seen. The Manta looked like he was drowning. Bulldozer wanted to go...well, bulldoze something. Hanz kept grinning for reasons known only to himself. No one wanted to ask him why he was mimicking a starving hyena. Me, i was getting worried. Being in the company of restless old people scares me plenty. Old people either faints or starts foaming at the mouth if left to their own idle mind for too long. Neither of which i am fond of watching. So i decided it was probably best that we find out where this Antony fella actually was. I hope he is actually in Malaysia. People do confuse coming to Malaysia and Singapore seeing that we are that close. Hanz called, first signs were good. He is in KL. Second sign, he is awake.
   After 3 minutes of chatter, turns out Antony is doing the exact nonsense we do. Go eat first. This fella learns very quickly i thought. Only 23 hours upon touch down and he has picked up so much.
   So with a brief consultation among the old goats, we decided to take off for our ride. Let Antony search for us in the trail.
   The usual Office trail to warm up. Then into Coronary for a wee bit of climbing. Up the tarmac towards Magic Carpet. Into Magic and up to Magic Circle before we came out at the tarmac for Manta to catch his breath. Sat down for a bit of hellos and chats.
   We heard him before we actually saw him. Antony was seen walking and shaking his head. Manta did the first thing every mountain biker does upon seeing a fellow buddy in distress. Manta took out his phone.
   "Hi Antony...! Look up. I have you on video. Try not to pant so much. Go on. Continue walking. Just two more switchbacks and you will be out. "
   We all smiled. It was a moment all of us looked forward to. This will be spoken about for the next 3 months whenever we think of Antony. Even Bulldozer stopped kicking pebbles and came over to watch.

   "Morning guys...."

   We waited a good 20 minutes before our guest could recall where he was on a Wednesday morning. Life is good indeed. None of us could speak Javanese, therefore we could not comfort our guest. All we could do was smile and offer him sticks to throw.

Plan C enterance.

   After 30 minutes of chatter, we decided to head into 2K. Short little spurt and we ended up at the cross roads. Took some time and photos for evidence. Then it was decided that the young ones head into Mission Reverse while Manta and Bulldozer went off to the retirees trail. Off we went.
   Antony came out of Mission with a huge smile on his face.
   "That was good. The downhill and switchbacks ...fantastic!"
   Tarmac up towards Barrakuda and we caught up with Manta. As usual, Manta has an apple and was halfway chewing it when we arrive. Apple break it is then. More chit chat and it was decided we head towards Plan C via Wasteland. Into Wasteland we went. Up towards reservoir and the group emerged at the tarmac. Did the usual Plan C loop and came back to the tarmac within a good 30 minutes. Antony looked like he was having fun. He couldn't figure out the climbing part though. He was looking high and low for the support lorry.
   " You mean we will have to ride back UP where we just came down from?"
   We could only smile.
   Short break and off we went back towards Wasteland before heading back to the cars.
   It was a short and sweet ride. Met old friends, hosted a buddy. Watch monkeys. Monkeys watched us. We both shook our heads. Kiara on a Wednesday. Who would have thought.

24th November KDCF.

He doesn't know yet...

   Friday. The ride was set at 1430 hours. Another odd time set by Manta. Retirees do go by their own quirky schedules. All we could do was smile.
   Arrived at 1400 hours. Saw a few early birds already at the car park. Waved and smiled at each other. Antony came out from Ben's car with a huge grin. Manta arrived. Then Guinness rolled in. Did the usual pre-ride chatter before we took off into KDCF.
   Not much said among the old goats. Nothing much can be said when you have to climb for a good 45 minutes in the humid secondary forest.

First stop.

   I only saw Unker stopped once to pee. Then the second time to burp. And the third time to get Guinness to stop so he has someone to talk to. I could only continue walking away in silence. Manta was further down talking to Tailook. I was utterly alone. Oh well... i continued walking. A good few silent moment passed before i emerge from the bush to see the group panting at the hut. Waited for the back markers to arrive for the customary photo taking session. I must have had my photos taken at the very same spot for the 48th time. Dementia can be very painful. Manta kept insisting we take the photo. Even when i reminded him that this will be the 49th time coming this year alone.

Second stop.

   Short apple break and off we went towards Serenity. The group took off and Manta had no other choice but to put his camera away. Up we went. More silence as the group tried their best not to faint and fart. Unker stopped again to pee.

   Caught up with the group at the enterance to Serenity. A brief headcount and off we went.
   Everyone emerged from Serenity with a smile. Antony was so happy he decided to snap his bike chain and walk the last 200 meters of Serenity. For camaraderie's sake, all of us stood by while we help watch Antony fix his chain. Done and dusted within minutes, into Salleh we went. Came out at the school for our next gossip stop. Antony was grinning ear to ear.

   " This is fun. I really enjoy this trail. Though the first climb very nearly killed me. I really enjoy this trail. "



   More chit chat and gossip before the group headed into Scouts to do the downhill bit towards our car. Manta looked like he was turning green. I decided to accompany him and we took the road back. Not nice to let the old fella mumble alone while cycling on the road. People will stare.

   Arrived at the car park and started preparing for the guys to return. Took another good hour before the first rider came out covered in mud. Looks like they had plenty fun washing their bikes later.
   Beer was served. All is good.





26th November Hash Ride:
   The guys decided to host Antony for his last ride here before he leaves for home. See photo collage below. It looked like he had fun too.

  It has been a memorable week for all. Having a fellow mountain biker here to ride our local trail has been a pleasure. Watching him suffer as we do on a weekly puts a smile on our face. This is why we ride.
   See you soon ... Next stop Bali!

   Un'believeable.

12th October 2017 Lazy Muck around ride.

   Another lazy Sunday...
   The entire bunch of goats went off to Semenyih for a revisit to one of our old Presidential trail. Wanted to join initially. However, the flu got the better of me. And old age. And laziness....
   It's been an awful month since returning from Bromo. For some reason, i couldn't bring myself to drive an hour in the dead of the morning for a ride on trail i rode numerous times. Hardly done any riding aside from 2 Kiara rides. It's gonna be a disaster when our buddy from Bromo drop in for his Kiara maiden ride. We are gonna be so screwed. I am hoping this Wednesday would be a good day to free load onto the Yellow Manta for a quick ride in Kiara. Otherwise, i may as well hang up the bloody bike for good.
   Woke up and sat around for a bit. Then it just got really boring after staring at the wall for a good 3 minutes. Grabbed the freshly built Stumpy and off i went. Wasn't quite sure where i was headed to. Hell, i just wanted to ride the bike somewhere before i go crazy from riding deprivations.
   Got out about 3km from the house. Came to a little bridge climb over the rail tracks. Kick the old Stumpy and it felt really weird. Cranked it a couple more times and decided it was probably best to check the bike out. Stopped at the bottom of the bridge and stared at the bike for a bit. Shook the crank and lo and behold. Bloody crank is swaying sideways. Damm. Thought i had that sorted out last week. Tried talking to it. Didn't work. Bounced it on the tarmac a few times. Didn't work. Took out the multi tool and spoke to it in a louder voice. Nope. Not working.

   Took a deep breath and hopped on to it. Hoping it will sort itself out after a few more minutes. Rode into the Malay Village to view some of the locals doing their shopping in the morning. Crank remains wonky. Took a turn into Sentosa hoping to meet some friends. Pedalled a few more clicks. Saw no one. Everyone must either still be asleep or have gone off to Semenyih.

   Decided to explore the place. Rode off in a general direction of the village pointing east. passed by a couple of freshly built houses. Followed the traffic and ended up on the other side of the village after a few minutes. Crank remains wonky.

   Oh well.... Let's head home via the railway tracks and see what we can do for the Stumpy. Took another 30 minutes before i finally got home. Sat the bike down in the garden and stared at it for a couple of minutes. This has got to be solved. Otherwise, it will be shit when i go riding up North.
   Decided to strip the Turner and Frankenstein the bike up.
   Voila.... sorted out within minutes.
   Now i know for sure. Truvativ cranks do not work with Shimanos. Bunch of monkeys. Can't these guys actually agree on a parallel size ? One fella has to get his crank spline 1mm smaller than the other so you can't cross over and share parts. Monkey's ass...

   The rest of the day went by in a blur.


   Then came across a buddy's posting on FB about a stray dog that he came across while riding. Charming little fella actually accompanied him up the hill for 8kms. Story got me smilling. That dog should be homed. Such a pity having that little fella all outside by himself. I would have taken him home.
   My thoughts went back to the strays behind my house.The strays in my place tries to nip off my ankles each time i pass them by. Those should be slapped some sense into them. Can't figure out why they are so angry all the time.

Unbelievable...

29th October 2017 Exploring ride around the local housing estate.

Muck around ride around the home ground.

   Woke up with a huge headache. Kiara plan cancelled within 2 seconds of getting out of bed. Decided it was not a good idea driving all the way with a leaky nose. Was all simply lazy really. Most of the old goats decided to go for the Hash ride somewhere in Rasa. Too hot a weather to drive 80km just to ride a trail i thought.
   Had my coffee and took the little ones out for their usual breakfast greet and meet at the local coffee shop.
Yadda yadaa... soccer mum duties till lunch time.
   Sat down at home at 1500 hours and stared at the wall for a few minutes. Open a can of beer perhaps?
Decided against it. Bloody fridge was too far away. Kicked a few pillows around and sat down again.
   "What the heck...."
   Threw on the helmet and gloves. Decided to go roaming around the neighborhood and see what i can discover. Moved here about 5 years ago, never really rode around to see what is available. Would be good to just wonder around a bit till dinner time. Besides, the bike needed a setting in ride. Took along some tools.
   Here we go. Left or right?
   Left turn it is. Rode for 13 feet and came across 2 mutts guarding the junction. They took one look at me and decided it would be fun to chase a barely warmed cyclist down the road for a bit. Bunch of monkeys. They really chased me for a good 5 minutes.

   Took me right to the riverside.Stopped to adjust my rear shock. Then took off riding again. Saw 2 more black mutts hiding under the car. Thought to myself, this will be ok. They are under the car after all. Rode past the car. And out they came. Charging at me like i rode over their bloody tail. What's going on today?
This pair chased me for a good 60 feet. Only backed off after i took out my pump and waved it at them.


   Can't believe my luck today. I was only out riding for 20 minutes and already got chased twice. Was it the pants?
   Rode along the river side. Looking around at people with their evening activities. Came across a little Indian temple and skipped across to look at it. Immediately, out came charging a brown mutt. What the hell.... Backed off and tried to move away. Bloody mutt came charging. Swung the pump at it and he finally took me seriously.
   This is really weird.
   Oh well. Shrugged and continued cycling...

   Took a turn. What do you see. 4 dogs. My lucky day... Of course they came charging . Again... After 2 minutes of raising my voice and screaming at them. I finally managed to ride away. Not without one mutt giving me the evil eye. I never hated dogs so much in my entire life.
   Decided it was probably better to head towards the Malay village and muck around there. I am pretty sure its safer there. Don't think i would get bullied by the resident stray cats i am sure.
   Took the track right beside the river and rode around peacefully for awhile. Came across a few kids who tried to challenge me to a smiling contest. Waved them off and went on my way.
   Saw a little hidden alley and decided to explore it. Came to a boom gate with a abandoned car. Dismounted and out came another mutt. This one was really upset. What the hell is it with the dogs today?? Yelled and waved my pump at it again. This one was really persistent. Came charging up to my pedals. Had no choice but to stand between the bike and cursed him in Hokkien. Cheeky fella even tried to nip my heel as i rode away.
   Finally entered the village. Peace of mind finally. No stupid PMS dogs in view. Rode right up to the sluice gate and a few guys fishing in the murky water.
   Looked at my watch and it was already 7ish.
   In total. I rode 10km. Took me almost 2 hours to do 10 clicks. Dismount like 100 times to confront about 14 dogs. What a day .... Kiara was probably safer by comparison.

   Unbelievable...