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| Carbo loading at its best. |
The flaccid return of a relic....
After being led into forced hibernation since April 2013, we are now being tasked to revive this old and pretty much dead forgotten dinosaur. How do we go about this exactly? Having lotsa Guiness and Strongbow to lubricate the cogs seems to help things move along.
Alcohol does amazing things to old donkeys. Makes them all motivated and full of energy. If you have ever seen a drunk moose, you would know exactly what i mean. Not exactly a proud subject to boast about but watching a drunk moose trying to convince another drunk moose is pretty entertaining. Having another moose repeating
"2 up, 2 up, 2 up...." to everything the first moose is saying seems to help raise the entertainment value by a few degrees.
And please do not try to decipher "
2 Up". You will need free flow of alcohol, quit your job, go on a low carb diet and enjoy digging up dirt with a fork to even remotely comprehend it.
Back to the serious bit. Its a new year.The same old donkeys still remains on the same team. Still not having any success at recruiting more sweet young things to come on the team. The only people we managed to recruit by far are either close to being senile, balding, closet gays or have some sort of disability somewhere. We are pretty much screwed i say.....
Things were different when i first stumbled upon this group back in year 2000. Meeting Krankster for the first ever ride in Kiara. I was hooked. And i refused to leave even after being called names and threatened with saliva.
Meetings and discussions were held in bright wholesome place. Macdonald's Bandar Utama was the mecca then. Starting point to Sungai Buloh was also at Macdonald's. Clean and safe. You didn't have to disinfect your hands after the meeting. Or get a blood test afterwards.
Nowadays....
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| Faces have been darkened to protect their identity. |
Iced Coke has given way to Kilkenny's. French fries have been traded for 4 weeks old muruku. No more happy sunny songs being sung, only half baked old folks songs are being heard shouted by half deaf goats. Meeting location is always a hush hush subject and will only be revealed hours beforehand. Very clandestine and dark. If you get lost trying to get to the location, don't call asking for help. You are better off going home and blame the dog for the car acting up. How much we have progressed and changed... God help us all.
Where did we go wrong?
So for the coming year. Let's make a list of things to achieve and over achieve if possible.
List of wants for 2015:-
1- More Miri Laksa.
2- Attend Happy Hours in dodgy pubs with lotsa overweight Vietnamese waitresses.
3- Learn Vietnamese.
4- More Curry Chicken.
5- Always smile and shake Judy's hands.
6- Get clearer X Ray pictures to view and compare.
7- Conduct meetings in Tavern GAB.
8- Convince Choi that goats are really cute and fluffy.
9- Convince Mei that Choi really likes goats.
10- Make a list of heart revival pills to carry during rides.
11- Keep track of how many times Bork falls sick.
12- Always thank Judy for food.
13- Remind Tailook that foldies are kiddy bikes NOT real bikes.
14- Do some rides in between the drinking and eating if possible.
15- Practice speaking Vietnamese diligently.
16- Go moose watching somewhere.
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| Here's to Free Drinks... |
Un'believeable...
There will not be any 4x4 sweeping from the back as you ride in. If you are the last rider. That really means your are the LAST rider. So it would make sense to plan your load and food rations properly. Trail is well guarded by the local villagers. They will actually seal the gate at night to prevent any intruders from entering. Which is a good thing. And a parking fee is applicable at the trail head. Camp site is a short 15km ride from the trail head. With relatively flat trail, only the last bit will require a wee bit of whip cracking to get in to the camp site. Camp site is fairly large with lotsa space to spread out for camp. So no need to sharpen the parang for this trip.
The guys are hoping the regular 4x4 boys will not show up at the same camp site. Otherwise, the camp site might get a bit cramped and noisy. The 4x4 boys usually will bring in a generator, a fridge, welding machine, 2 suckling pigs and probably 6 barrels of beers. So let's keep our fingers crossed.
